How to calm a crying baby –
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How to calm a crying baby –

We used to think that babies came into the
world really not being able to do anything, and what we know now is that they’re really
competent little beings, absolutely crying out to build relationships with those around
them. We just really need to let them teach us and to follow their cues, and to tune into
them in order to build those relationships with them Our baby does try and communicate in lots
of different ways. You can see in facial expressions what he likes and dislikes. Sort of just be frustrated, try to pick them
up. If they don’t want to relax then put them down, don’t want you to pick them up,
they’re just confused, they’re tired. Babies are absolutely able to engage with
what’s around them at a very early age. They will sense from their mother’s tone
for example if their mother is stressed. They will respond to smiles and happiness, but they will also respond to loud voices and shouting, and often a baby will start crying when another baby cries. So each time a carer tunes in to these cues
from their baby, each time they smile when a baby tries to smile at them, each time they
talk back to them when the baby makes a noise, when they pick them up or stroke them or soothe
them when they’re crying, then that baby is learning I’m important and I really matter
here. With all the research knows that children
who have had high quality conversations and just chats about things with their parents,
they enter school much more ready and able to learn, and they actually often go on to
do much better at school as well. Now it doesn’t matter really too much what you talk about,
especially to a young baby. It’s much more about the tone of voice that you’re using,
how you’re smiling at them, how you’re giving a little space for their responses,
which actually might just be a moving of their mouth with a very young baby. It is sometimes hard to know what they’re
crying about, especially at this age I’m finding, because their needs progress. When they were younger and they used to cry and I wasn’t sure what they were crying about, I used to find it frustrating because
it could be anything. They could be hungry, tired, they might even have a belly ache and
you don’t know. A baby really helps us by having very different
cries for different needs that they have, so sometimes a baby will have a very particular
cry for when they’re hungry, another cry for when they’re tired, a different cry,
maybe just a whimper for when they just want a cuddle. A really useful tip too is to try and pre-empt
the crying. You know, think about the signals your baby’s giving you. Sometimes before
they really cry, you can see them maybe getting a little bit red, or a little bit anxious
moving about, and if you change what you’re doing with your baby at that point, sometimes
you can stop it going into a complete meltdown. Now sometimes you will have checked all possibilities
for your child. You know they’re not ill, you know they’re not hungry, you know they’re
not tired, and you haven’t over stimulated them and you’ve cuddled them and cuddled
them, and still they’re crying, so you might just have to try some different things. Some
babies just need to be in a different room and have something different to look at or
focus on. Some babies might really enjoy having music played to them, particularly nice soothing
music. Some babies will love being danced around with, and that will be what will calm
them and make them feel better. I used to take Eden out a lot in one of those
baby carriers, and that was a way, especially with colic that she would calm down, because
it wasn’t that she was in this excruciating pain, it was just whatever it was, was obviously
discomfort, but by being outside and seeing things and seeing other areas, it would distract
her, and actually then she’d often go to sleep. Little babies, and some more than others can
get very easily over stimulated. They can’t manage long periods of playing, which is what
it is for them, and they will show you. They’ll start to get a little bit edgy before they
cry, and the more you try, you know, the rocking and the singing and all the different things
that you generally do for crying, the worse it’s likely to get. That’s the time to
just tuck the baby down, maybe swaddle them a little bit if they’re very tiny, keep
their arms in so they’re not flailing about, and just try and calm them down in a quiet,
dark room and just wait a few minutes to see if they’ll settle down. So sometimes you might hear a mother say “oh
he’s always angry at me, he’s always crying, I can never do enough for him”, perhaps
even about their six week old baby, and actually it’s important to know that that baby’s
just trying to communicate. The more that a baby is soothed when it cries at a young
age, the far less likely it is actually to cry as it gets older.

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